Friday, February 13, 2009

Mickey Rourke Would Hump A Gorilla Before Courtney Love

There are rumors floating around that Mickey Rourke is dating Courtney Love. Courtney Love is the epitome of disgusting. I never want my life to get to the point that someone says I may be dating Courtney Love. If it did, I'd probably take a cross-country Amtrak train hostage and reenact Under Siege 2. 

So how dare someone says it about Mickey Rourke. 

Rourke, who better win the Oscar for Best Actor, recently addressed these rumors with TMZ by saying, "He'd rather hump a gorilla than Courtney Love." Do you know how awesome that is? Here's a guy, vying for an Oscar, telling people he'd rather hump a massive gorilla than another human being of the opposite sex.

The people that choose Oscars are old people. Old people who are dying, old people who like the movie Citizen Kane, old people who love Sean Penn for being a completely vile American scumball. These old people get really offended when someone says something like what Mickey Rourke said.

The thing is, he doesn't care. He could care less whether or not he wins the biggest acting award there is. All he cares about is doing what he wants to do. If Rourke wants to wrestle Chris Jericho at Wrestlemania 25, he's gonna do it. In a time of A-Rod bowing to the pressure of superstardom, here's a guy who's comeback has made everyone take notice and he could still give a rats ass. 

It's refreshing. It's awesome. For his sake, I hope the guys wins the award for Best Actor. And then I hope he grinds on someone and does this

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