Swine Flu

I hate it. Fucking hate it. I don't know what it is, don't give a crap ass about it. Maybe I have it. Maybe that's why I haven't updated in a few days? I have been extremely busy at work. Wayyy tooo busy for my own good.

I will update soon. If I don't die from swine flu first. Word.

Jesus. Manny.

Manny Ramirez is an astounding baseball player.

I'm a Yankees baseball fan, and for good reason. I went to games for 10 straight years and sat behind the Yankees dugout in the first row. I traveled to New York with my father and we'd hang out in that beast of a city and watch the Yankees dominate the game. It was infinitely better than anything you could have experienced in Chicago at Wrigley or Comiskey.

I hated Manny Ramirez when he became a Boston Red Sock. He hit four home runs a game, he had way too much fun when he played the game and he was a terrible outfielder. You could have put an 83-year old amputee out there who would have been just as effective. The dude used to play the outfield with a water bottle shoved into his back pocket. Every now and then he'd play The Green Monster like a master and throw someone out at second. Or he'd cut off a throw from the center fielder to the third basemen for no apparent reason.

For some odd reason though, I always had a little thing for Manny. I guess I wished more players would be like him. Having fun isn't a bad thing. That's what made him and David Ortiz a perfect match.

Past transgressions aside, Manny now plays for the Dodgers. Last night, he hit a home run 67,000 feet out of Minute Maid Park in Houston. I was recently at that park and that train track is easily 120-150 feet up in the air. Maybe even 175 feet. And it's back about 25 rows from the first row of the stands. He hit it out and over the Citgo sign. Jesus Christ.

Manny is 36 and has played 15 years. He has 531 career home runs, averaging 36 a year over the last 5 years. Barry Bonds played 22 years in the majors and hit 762 home runs.

It's highly unlikely but if Manny played 5 more years (including this year) and averaged 35 home runs a year, he'd hit 175 more. That'd put him at 706 and second all-time. Could he play longer? Sure. The dude just hits. He enjoys playing all over so I bet he'd hate to DH full-time in the AL but he could. He wants to go to the Indians and finish his career there and I bet he could hit full-time until he's 45 and still hit at least 20 home runs a year. He's that damn good.

I've never been happier to be a Manny Ramirez fan. I'm just thankful he's not a Red Sock anymore. Kudos to the best pure hitter we've seen in the last 15 years.

Lindsay Soto's Boob Might Pop Out...

...during the middle of a TV interview during the middle of a hockey game.

I've said before and I'll say it again, Versus TV Network is the worst television station in the world. Clearly their director of operations is a six-year old retarded kid with super ADD. Their coverage of the NHL All-Star Game was arguably the worst coverage of a sporting event I've ever seen. The idea of the NHL Playoffs on Versus AT ALL is something that bothers the hell out of me. Every game should be on ESPN or NBC but that's another argument for a future date.

Anywho, the whole point of this story is that Lindsay Soto, Versus' sideline reporter interviewed Anaheim's Rob Niedermayer during last night's Game 3 vs. San Jose. During the interview, her boobs were just hanging out because she was wearing a low cut shirt. She had to cover them a few times to make sure Rob Niedermayer couldn't see all the way down to her bellybutton.

There's two approaches to this whole thing...

A) Sideline reporters should wear some better shirts in case they are in this exact situation. I'll openly admit if Erin Andrews' or Lindsay Soto's breast popped out during an interview, I'd be first in line to see it. However, the whole basis behind their job is that they are great interviewers and are there to focus on the story right? All the feminists insist that the Lindsay Soto's and Erin Andrews' of our world have their jobs because of their talent and brains, not because of their gorgeous looks.

If that's the case, they don't need to wear revealing tops that might showcase some goodies if they lean over to interview a player. During that interview, where she does admittedly do a good job, she took much of the focus away from Niedermayer because she started playing with her boobs.

She should be able to wear a turtleneck and still be as popular and effective because of the great job she does, not because her boobs look great. If not, women need to just admit that people only care about their bodies. (Yikes)

B) This discussion shouldn't be happening in the first place because players should never be interviewed in the middle of the game.

Nascar drivers are interviewed from their car during races, NFL players are interviewed on the sidelines, NHL players get questioned while they are on the ice. It's retarded.

Let them play and worry about the interviews at a different time. Most of the questions are dumb as hell anyways and here we are asking them in the heat of the battle. It's one of the dumbest directions that sports has shifted in in a looong time.

Either way, whatever. I don't care anymore. She's a good reporter, is really hot, and is on Versus. There's the problem in the first place.

Mark Morrison Mondays

Mark Morrison is a bad ass. Since he has nothing much to do nowadays, he spends his time looking for sweet stuff on the internet. Occasionally he gets distracted by watching too much sports and wrestling and he gets lazy. Being 4-20, it's amazing he did any work today at all. He put his pistol and weed away for a bit and came up with these gems. Enjoy.

- More hockey highlights. Here's Boston's Milan Lucic dishing out a cross check to the face in the Bruins-Canadiens playoff series. Lucic was labeled a typical Serbian douchebag, a title that is fitting in a way but not in this case. Lucic simply saw a man on skates coming towards him and cross checked his face. Nothing wrong in my book.

**Playoff hockey seems to be very one-sided in terms of the officiating. The Chicago Blackhawks are getting punched and elbowed and shoved at all times after the whistle by the Calgary Flames and the refs haven't called anything. They also missed a blatant high-sticking penalty at the end of the 2nd Period.

- Remember this commercial? It started the milk ads that you see so often today. Pretty clever commercial, huh? Guess who made it?...yep, that's right...Michael Bay. Yikes.

- I clicked on this movie trailer because it has Evangeline Lilly from "Lost" in it. And she's ridiculously hot and pretty much the perfect girlfriend. But she's not in this trailer. God damnit.

Regardless, this looks like a solid flick. It won a bunch of artsy awards and any time you can highlight and give credit to the men and women in our armed forces who give us the ability to do the dumb stuff that we do everyday, I'm all for it.

- Another movie trailer. This one's about Muhammad Ali. Ali is one of sports history's most lucid and popular characters and you either loved him or hated him. This new documentary showcases the impact of Ali from the viewpoint of 10 of his most acclaimed opponents. The trailer is worth viewing whether you liked Ali or not. He electrified this world in ways no one before him had. It looks beautiful and has some star power behind it. Check it out.

- Jessica Biel is smoking hot. In this movie, she gets a bit naked. Thank you Christ.

4/20 Honor

I don't smoke weed. Sorry...Alcohol? Yes, please.

But for those that do enjoy the blazing, though your day is probably almost over or has been for a while, here's a cool video to watch the next time you consume weed.

Courtesy of vimeo and David Coiffier, this is the I-Movix SprintCam. The I-Movix SprintCam films shows us everything at 1000 frames per second. Yea, its that awesome.

Lollapalooza Lineup Announcement!

The Lollapalooza announcement happens tomorrow...

Rumored headliners include the Beastie Boys, Depeche Mode, a re-united Jane's Addiction, The Killers, Kings of Leon, and Rise Against.

Rumors have been running rampant throughout the country about who is going to be playing the popular summer festival in Chicago and Perry Farrell will put the rumors to rest tomorrow when he goes live on Q101 in Chicago with the official lineup.

He'll be on @ 8am to announce and from what I've heard (from those who have seen it), it's an incredible list of bands. There's a few surprises in there and an overall solid list from top to bottom. I won't say right or wrong on any band but those with an eclectic taste of music will get all their ADD desires served.

8AM. Listen @ Q101.com!

Correction Ma'am. Your Son IS a Piece of Shit.

It's been over a week since Los Angeles Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart and two others were killed in a car accident by a man who had a blood-alcohol level three times the legal limit at the time of the crash.

That man, Andrew Gallo, has spent his time in the Orange County jail since killing Adenhart, Courtney Stewart, and Henry Pearson, and seriously injuring Jon Wilhite. Gallo's bail was set for $2 million and he is set to be arraigned on June 8th.

Part of me hopes he never makes it to that date and is instead killer in jail or commits suicide and saves us all from wasting more tax money on a dumb trial for a piece of shit human being. Another part of me actually wants him to be alive because he will have to suffer through what will be the most painful process a human being will ever have to endure. He will sit through a trial and continually see the faces of the 3 people he killed, while watching those loved ones' families stare through his eyes with burning feelings of hatred and disgust. It's quite the dilemma.

A new wrinkle in this unfortunate circus is that Gallo's family has finally decided to speak on the whole matter. Gallo's mother, Sandra Sagahon, feels her son has been demonized by the media in the wake of the crash and is really a good person.

Here's a hint Sandra...your son is a piece of fucking shit.

"It was an accident," Sagahon said. "He never meant to hurt anybody, ever."

Sagahon is a mother, seeing her son in jail for a horrible crime. He is charged with three counts of murder, driving under the influence of alcohol and fleeing the scene of an accident. He faces 55 years to life if convicted on all charges. It's understandable that his mother is defending him. That's what mothers do.

Unfortunately, for her, this isn't going to turn out well. Her son's life is well over.

Gallo was born in El Monte, California and lived in Baldwin Park, Calif., before his mother and father divorced when he was 5. According to Gallo's father, Andrew took the divorce especially hard.

Gallo bounced around living with both his mother and father, who both remarried others. According to Gallo's father, Andrew found moving difficult and he took up drinking ot help with him "problems."

Gallo's father didn't allow alcohol in the house so Andrew hung out with his stepbrother Raymond Rivera (another piece of human trash), who according to family members was also an alcoholic. Rivera was with Gallo on the night of the crash as well.

Gallo was first arrested in 2006 on suspicion of DUI. He went to a rehabilitation facility as part of his plea deal but Gallo moved in and out of rehab over the next few years. He was in and out of contstruction jobs and supposedly turned in a job application to Sears the day before the accident.

Gallo and Rivera got drunk at a few different bars the night of the murder, though the specific bar they were at before the accident remains uknown.

On his growing up, Sagahon said of her son, "I didn't think he was out getting into trouble. It's not like he was a bad kid or a gang member."

"I don't want another tragedy like this. I don't wish this upon nobody, not those parents that lost their three little angels. Would someone want to be in my shoes right now? I don't think so and I don't wish it upon anybody," she said.

Family members of the Gallo's have temporarily moved to an undisclosed location based on numerous death threats they've received over the last week. They said their son was talking about getting his life together but that doesn't mean anything to anyone anymore.

Three young people lost their life while another one fights for his in the hospital. Like I said last week when this happened, people are dying everyday, all over the world. It's an unfortunate situation. Nick Adenhart happened to be a professional baseball player, so this is magnified even more.

Andrew Gallo, now sits, day in and day out worrying about his fate. If he didn't have demons before, he sure as hell has them now.

"People think my son is a monster," Gallo's father said. "He's not."

Unfortunately, no one will see it this way. Surprisingly, there's enough common sense left in our world that we can and should vilify this young man who tore so many people's worlds apart. I don't care that he suffered through a divorce, I don't care that he couldn't find steady work. Andrew Gallo was screwed up in the head and he was an alcoholic who shouldn't have been roaming our streets. He hung out with a trash-pile of a stepbrother who only fed his darkest problem.

The more and more the Gallo's talk about their 'good' son, the more and more they risk their lives and their son's life. Andrew Gallo was an idiot. He got really drunk, got behind the wheel of a vehicle, and killed 3 people. No matter how many tears he sheds at the trial, Gallo remains a waste of human life. People like him are somehow born, somehow make it through 22 years of life, and somehow transplant their demonic seed in other people's lives.

Lives are ruined everyday by ridiculous pieces of shit that roam our earth. If all the gang members in the world killed themselves off in their own battles, I'd be more than happy. If all the alcoholic drivers killed themselves by driving off a cliff, I'd be more than happy. If child rapists stepped in front of speeding trains more often, I'd be more than happy.

Sadly, they don't. They hurt others instead. I'm sorry Mrs. Sagahon, your son was the ultimate piece of shit.

Matthew Stafford Still Sucks More Than Jay Cutler

I'm a Bears fan. The Bears now have Jay Cutler as their QB. So I could give a sh*t about the NFL Draft.

I hate Matthew Stafford because he didn't turn out to be as good as he was supposed to be at Georgia, yet he might be the first pick in the NFL Draft anyways. I also hate him because Mike Singletary hates him. Mike Singletary basically called him a weiner because Stafford hasn't gotten over his parents divorce and still cries at night about it.

Anyways, Stafford made an appearance on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last evening and threw footballs through plates that Jimmy Fallon was tossing into the air. Stafford does an impressive job and seems like a good sport so I probably shouldn't hate him as much as I do.

That said, he looks like a fat retarded kid from down south so I definitely would be pissed if my team ended up drafting him. I won't have to worry about that. The Bears have Jay Cutler.

Here's the clip from NBC.com.

"Funny The Way It Is" - Dave Matthews Band

The Dave Matthews Band has released the first single off their upcoming album, "Big Whiskey & The Groogrux King", for download, available on their website.

The forthcoming album is their first release since 2005's "Stand Up" and the first since founding member, saxophonist LeRoi Moore, died due to complications from an ATV accident.

Whether or not you're a DMB fan now, probably 75% of people between the ages of 14-35 have had a significant portion of their life affected by DMB. Whether it was in high school, college, or the years after, DMB played a significant role in many peoples coming of age. People drink to it, people smoke to it, people make love to it. Dave Matthews Band is a staple in our pop culture world.

The point is, don't dismiss this new album as just another album from the band. The cover art is clearly a tribute to Moore and the songs suggest full emotions were poured into this effort. This will be arguably the bands most significant album release. That's a big statement.

The first single is a classic mix of down-tempo jazz and southern rock that mixes with Dave Matthews' anticipating brooding. The song is a full-effort from the entire band including the new members who replaced Moore.

Give it a chance and relive the glory days from Dave Matthews Band. Whether you move on right after or give them another chance to enter your world again, it's worth it.

Jesus That's Depressing

Here's a photo from Videogum:

If you can't figure out what's happening, a future terroristic warrior is cooking his dinner in what used to be an old Blockbuster Video tape drop.

We used to return late videos into this thing and now some foreign country uses it as an oven. Yikes. That's really depressing.

Part of the reason half the world hates us is because they see how we used to use these things to return dumb movies we watched. Someone inevitably watched "3 Ninja's" on VHS and one day returned it in this exact box (by no means am I implying that 3 Ninja's was bad though). The world laughs at our incredibly terrible taste in movies and sees that we used to produce large metal boxes that would house these returned flicks. Eventually, we got so lazy that we began to rent online, and these drop boxes became useless. So, we shipped them off to 3rd World Country's and airdropped them in like we did in "Operation Dumbo Drop". Next thing you know, the young terroristic warriors are being told by their parents and village leaders that America was a wasteful country who couldn't even use VHS drop boxes! They spit on the drop boxes then proceed to have to cook their food in them because they are too poor for anything else.

And we wonder why people hate us.


** On a side note...there is a light at the end of the dark tunnel we are in. United Airlines announced today that they are banning fat people from flying on their planes. If you can't put the armrest down and can't buckle the seatbelt using ONE seatbelt because you are so fat, you must by an extra seat next to you. If there is no seat next to you, you must get off and wait for a later flight.

It's about time this happens. I'm by no means a totally fit person, but when a fat, smelly person is next to me taking up two seats, that's crossing the line. America is full of lazy, fat, uneducated, unmotivated pieces of shit. It's time we fight back. Fat people are destroying America's health care system. It's so damn expensive for health care because of the fat asses who eat McDonald's 5 times a week and have sex once every 482 years. Why should I have to pay the exact same amount for health care as Charlie Chuckman who weighs 327 lbs? I fully support United Airlines initiative and you should too. Slowly, maybe we can climb out of this dark, dark tunnel we have entered. This is a great first step.

F*ck you fat people.

WTF

Craig Ferguson is hilarious. His talk show is really good but it's somewhat dragged down by lackluster guests and the olden, moth-like set he has.

If I had to rank the late night shows it would go:

1) Any Conan
2) Letterman
3) Kimmel
4) Ferguson
5) Fallon
6) Leno
14) Carson Daly

There are moments though that Craig Ferguson busts out of his so-so show and shows that he is an awesomely hilarious comedian who really could give a crap about anything else. Those moments usually result in hilarious bits, like this one here.

Ferguson has done cold-opens for his show where he just dances around with monkees, puppets, and other weird sh*t. That had been retired for a bit until last night when Ferguson brought back the crazy puppet opening. Prepare to laugh and be really f'ing confused. That's the point.

The Hood Internet

The Hood Internet is an absolutely AWESOME f*cking website.

It's remixes and more remixes. And awesome f*cking remixes.

Here's an example...Beastie Boys Vs. Matt & Kim - "Good Ol' Fashion Rump Shaker"

For your endless entertainment pleasure, I've linked "The Hood Internet" on the right for those of you that spend your nights not spooning hot girls and fat chicks. Enjoy.