Yikes

I hate Florida (Gators, not Disney World) and I hope Urban Meyer coaches again so some team can annihilate his stupid team and Meyer passes out on the sideline and never gets up.

Nonetheless, I give credit where credit is due and this kid, albeit on the Florida basketball team (which I hate much less) stabs a bunch of stakes through the heart of the NC State basketball team with this game winning basket.

It's a ridiculously perfect shot.

Happy New Year

Fat Guy Jumps Into a Lake.....

Creed Shreds - The highlight of Creed Shreds is seeing it on 'Film Drunk' and seeing that the video won the 'Best Viral Video No One Sent Me' award on FD. I saw Creed this summer and it was awesome slash horrible and so the Creed Shreds video has provided hours upon hours of endless laughter that has ended in internal bleeding numerous times.

Awesome Video I Just Saw For the First Time Ever...

Scott Niedermayer Stick Fight

Bas Rutten Bar Defense Video

The Best of Both Worlds: Christian Bale vs. David

J*zz in My Pants

And just because it was one of the most highly viewed videos of the year/all-time

Holy Tuesday

There was a gospel choir performing in the lobby of my work today for a special Thanksgiving charity drive. Actually, like 4 different gospel choirs. The first group was a group of little kids playing the violin and they were f#cking terrible. An older group followed that up and melted faces and then a younger group came on and rocked the stage too. That put me in a good mood. I proceeded to go listen to Sister Act music and Kirk Franklin and God's Property.

*It also made me say, holy crap, how'd I forget this video of Paula Deen getting nailed in the face with a frozen ham yesterday!?!? Random food drive, people passing hams, and some guy f#cking chucked a frozen ham across the room and it nailed her in the face. Everybody instantly got super pissed at said person and Paula walked out of the room, hands to face, shocked that some jerk got giddy and threw a ham.

*Some of the good crap I found today should make me suggest you go to With Leather for everything and stop reading my dumb stuff here but I'll also give you the option to click below and see it here.

"House" is, from what I hear, a good show on Fox and Hugh Laurie is sorta cool. That said, I've never watched it. But I've seen enough previews to know that Omar Epps looks just like Mike Tomlin and it needs to be acknowledged in some way. They look identical. Everyone says it. Tomlin probably played Epps in "Love & Basketball" and Epps probably coached the Steelers to a Super Bowl Victory...they are the same person. But never admit it...

"House", show that I'll never ever see, finally agreed. Take a look.

*Another gem from WL, this one is creepy. Parents dream for their kids to be good at sports or music or whatever. Whoever is parenting this kid is clearly shoving steroids into his butt and giving him HGH. This kid, named Nyrel Sevilla (I know wtf?), is 6-years old and destroys people left and right. Other kids aren't even MOVING on the field and he's running full speed to kill. Getting into the discussion about should 6-year olds even be playing full-contact football is another question for another day. Watch the video.

*Lil Wayne makes good music. But he's in jail. And although this isn't his music, it involves him and a nice up and coming band that's very critically acclaimed. All it takes is someone to remix the two and turn it into a song. In this case, we get "Fireman on the Ground" from MOKB.

*Lastly, before I forget, supposedly someone punched Jimmy Clausen in the face over the weekend after his team of losers lost to UConn. Apparently Clausen was leaving a restaurant when someone sucker-punched him in the face. I imagine they told him he sucks, his coach has a FUPA, and he looks like an ostrich, but in reality it was probably something else at play here. Something else like God disguising himself as a human and punching Clausen's face to punish Notre Dame for letting Barack Obama speak at Notre for their spring graduation ceremony. It was one of God's big FU's. I imagine God punched Clausen then stood over his body and looked at Clausen's female friend and gave her the big ole Degeneration X 'Suck It' sign.

Hockey. Again...it's awesome.

I saw this last night but the TV was on mute so I had no idea what the hell was going on. All I saw was Anaheim's Scott Niedermayer standing at the glass watching a bunch of people fight. I was watching to see anyone random was gonna get punched in the face on accident. I had no idea that there was a hockey stick in there as well. Shit really could have gotten crazy.

In review, Scott Niedermayer was being a good guy and trying to give his stick to someone in the stands after the game. As usually happens, some obnoxious prick tries to intercept the intended receipient and steal their prized new gift. More often than not, people boo the crap out of the scumbag and he concedes and gives the intended receipient their gift. In this case, a fight broke out. Wives/girlfriends were involved and Niedermayer sort of backed away slowly like what the fuck? The best part was the entire stadium was blacked out except for the spotlight on Niedermayer and as he stood there, the whole stadium realized he just started a riot. If this had been Ron Artest on skates, he would have scaled the glass and taken his skate off and started slashing people's throats in half. That would have made Sportscenter's Top 10 Plays for sure.

Either way, when a sports player gives someone something specific, don't try and steal it from the intended receipient. It makes you a huge prickface and then violence sometimes breaks out.

It is fun to watch though....

Megan Fox Mondays!!

Yikes. What a weekend. Yesterday was a long, fun day. I'll explain it later.

More importantly, some random new stuff today. Not a lot, but at least its stuff. And I think it's cool. Which means you should too.


- "The Dark Knight" premieres on HBO this Saturday night, June 13th. HBO made two pretty cool TV spots for the premiere and you can see them HERE and HERE. The song featured is The Pixies "Where Is My Mind". It's a shame to see these ads and think that Heath Ledger is dead. His legend as The Joker is continually growing in time. It truly was an amazing role.

- I link to this video at "With Leather" because what is said over there under the clip is a true statement. People like this are in our government, helping to run a country and helping us decide to buy and bailout corporations like GM. I'm not gonna sugar-coat it. This country is F*CKED with the people we have running it now.

Sorry. The above clip is internet sensation/semi-retard Corrine Brown (D-FL) making an asshole of herself again with fellow U.S. Representative Maxine Waters (D-CA). They are arguing/speaking retard about the Lakers/Magic NBA Finals series which is already a joke at 2-0 Lakers. Waters at least can form an argument and seems to understand something about the NBA and the Lakers. The fact she refused to shake Brown's hand is also awesome. Even she understands how dumb Brown is. The fact Brown got into office based off of the above video and this INSTANT CLASSIC VIDEO makes me positive that every person that voted for her was deaf, blind, and severly handicapped. Brown graduated from Florida and apparently received a degree in public speaking and mental retardedness. Yes. This country is f*cked.

- Here's a breakdown of some things that are happening right now with our government and spending...

Bush deficits in his 8-years:

$158B in 2002, $378B in 2003, $413B in 2004, $318B in 2005, $248B in 2006, $162B in 2007, $410B in 2008.

That's $2,087,000,000,000 in deficit over Bush's 8 years. For those curious, the deficit is calculated when you take out the country's expenses from the country's income. That's the deficit. It's different from the national debt.

Bush had been cutting the deficit for a few years but financial bailouts, a weakening economy, and continued wars pushed the deficit back up in his final year of office.

Now, for Obama...
Obama's deficits in 150 days:

$787B "Stimulus" plan, $275B proposed housing plan, $400B for Congress' remaining appropriations bills, $2T proposed financial-stabilization plan and $50B-plus bailout for GM.

The White House is projecting a $1.75T deficit for 2010, while the Congressional Budget Office (CBO) has projected it to be $1.85T. That is over TRIPLE the amount that Bush had in his final year of office.

Over the next 8 years, Obama's projected deficits look like this:

$1.85T in 2009, $1.35 T in 2010, $900B in 2011, $650B in 2012, $675B in 2013, $750B in 2014, $790B in 2015, $850T in 2016. By 2019, the CBO projects the deficit to be at $1.18T for that year based on Obama's presidency.

Calculating a frightening 8 years in office for Obama you get $7,815,000,000,000 in deficit. And that's without the proposed $2T financial stabilization plan in the projections.

Yes, Bush spent money. A LOT. But Obama is spending right now like Bush on steroids. He's doing exactly what he promised NOT to do.

* Bush expanded the federal budget by a historic $700B through 2008. Obama's propositions would expand it by another $1T.
* Bush created a Medicare bill that will cost an estimated $800B in its first decade. Obama has proposed a $634B down payment on a new health care fund.
* Bush increased federal education spending 58% faster than inflation. Obama's increase would be a 116% increase.
* Bush became the first President to spend 3% of the GDP on Federal Antipoverty Programs. Obama has increased this spending by 20%.
* Bush tilted the income tax burden toward more upper-income taxpayers. Obama is continuing that trend (partly why upper-income ppl hate Obama and partly bc lower-income ppl couldn't afford taxes based on these projections).

It's scary where we are heading. Obama's approval ratings are dipping but remain relatively high considering our country is made up of a majority of super retarded idiots. Also, since we now own GM, where the hell is my car? I want one, we own it, gimme a damn car.


- Possibly, the gayest commercial on TV. I like Tiger, like Jeter, like Federer (bc I hate Nadal so much). Unfortunately, this commercial is terrible. Only NIKE could have made this semi-cool.

- Remi Gaillard, French Footballer, does his best Tiger golf ball bounce impression...and I must say...this might be cooler.

(head over to With Leather to read about the Cardinals/Pirates dream and also watch the video. it's slightly smaller video over there but the dream is hilarious)

- "The Hangover" finished a very close 2nd (and might be first after actual numbers are released) to "Up" at the box office this weekend. "Up" garnered $44.2 M while "Hangover" was at $43.3 M. Both movies are on my list of must-sees.

- Weird interview with Zach Galifiankis from Videogum. Weird but still funny. The man is impeccably funny.

- Bret Michaels almost got killed/beheaded/smashed last night at The Tony Awards. Performing on-stage with the "Rock of Ages" (?) cast, Michaels supposedly 'missed his mark'. This whole thing is wrong so I'm not going to research what the actual name of the cast is that Michaels performed with, I'm not going to see how many Tony Award shows there have been, I'm not going to find out why the F Bret Michaels was there at all. He almost got his head cut off. That's hilarious.

- Courtesy of FADER and Hot97, Jay-Z's new single from the forthcoming "Bluprint 3" has hit the internet. As Jay-Z says, he is the Frank Sinatra of hip-hop. The beat is awesome and it evokes "American Gangster"-like emotions for me. Count me in as one of the millions awaiting the sick beats on the new album.

- Phoenix is so damn awesome. Here's another version of "1901"...this time an incredible acoustic version for some French TV bs.

- Lastly, more of the above Megan Fox photos. Love.

I'm Caucasian

This video is hilarious.

I'm white and I gave up playing basketball a bunch of years ago.

Enjoy this bit about the NBA.

Mark Morrison Mondays

Got my coat, blackberry, and keys stolen this weekend. We were hanging out at the bar, I kept checking the table our group had all our stuff on, and then everything was gone. My stuff is replaceable but someone we were with, visiting from Ohio, had her car keys taken with her coat. The car had to get towed to a dealership and a new key programmed.

I spent most of Sunday praying that whoever did it either got hit by a train and dragged 2918 yards to their death or had to watch their dog get repeatedly run over by a UPS truck. I also hoped that that person's family members melted like that crazy Nazi from 'Raiders of the Lost Ark'.

Anyways, here's my dump of schtuff from the weekend. There's no order to it and probably never will be. Who knows why I find it interesting for you. I just do. Mark Morrison is going to present it each week. Yes, the Mark Morrison of 'Return of the Mack' fame. Why?

Because he's the coolest and so was that song.

- 'Sooty' the guinea pig escapes from jail and has 43 kids. I once had a guinea pig named 'Nibbles'. He nibbled on an electrical wire and died. It was a rough day.

- Drew Barrymore might direct the third movie in the 'Twilight' series. Um. Yea.

- The missing NFL players at sea may have been found. Dead. One was a Raider. No surprise. Pirates are real.

- I agree 'With Leather', who paid for President Obama's courtside seats to the Wiz/Bulls? I mean, every penny we can save counts, right? Whose pennies were those?

- Also, Obama's speechwriter is Jon Favreau? THIS Jon Favreau?!?

- Kanye cut his weird mullet-hawk. And he's hanging out with the black Bridgette Nielsen.

- Jimmy Fallon starts tonight as host of 'Late Night with Jimmy Fallon'. I'm gonna give it a chance.

- And Megan Fox is still the most beautiful person in the world. Just making sure.

- Return of the Mack.

Lance Armstrong Is Still Awesome

Let me preface this by saying how much I HATE when TV cuts away from sporting event intruders. Remember when you thought the Russians were attacking when 'Fan Man' landed his parachute in the middle of the ring during the 1993 Holyfield/Bowe Heavyweight title fight? People reacted in sheer terror and amazement. Some people just began beating the dude's ass because they didn't know what was happening, while others thought the nuclear holocaust was on hand.

TV stations today cut away from fan-interference because they don't want to 'showcase the idiots on TV'. Networks feel that showing these people on television will futhur encourage that kind of stuff to happen. That's stupid. Aside from the endless entertainment I get when things like this happen, showing that would highly encourage someone to never do that again.

Being tackled by an NFL linebacker or being spiked in the face by a baseball player's jumpkick would discourage most people from running onto the field of play. It would be awesome to watch and it would make someone think twice about being retarded. Somebody runs onto a basketball court during the Suns game? Shaq could beat their face in with a Gatorade jug and it would be fine by me.

Thanks to 'With Leather', I saw this highlight of Lance Armstrong at the Tour of California, as he prepares for another Tour de France. Some moron ran onto the course while carrying a gigantic fake syringe. Lance, displaying his epic balance and Texas bravado, shoved the fat jackass into the snow.

Watch and enjoy, in order, below:

Lance 1

Lance 2

Lance 3

Lance 4

*Note the fat man's face as he is shoved to the ground and as he gets back up. And watch the fellow riders in the background. Whether they like seeing Lance pestered or seeing this moron go blubber-first into the snow, who cares. They enjoyed it.